I am Gay and I have no friends, I just dont know what I should do?

Hey Guys, I am a 17 year Old Guy, I have found going through my teenage years is very difficult, and I have some problems which I just dont know how to deal with. When I was younger I always remember wanting to be with a girl, Look after her , share life together have a family and a house etc. etc. but as I went to secondry school I realised I had ual feelings for guys. This is something I never really wanted, it just happened. As I grew up over the next year (I was 13/14), I began to get emotional and ual feelings for this guy in school, But I felt I could never tell him because If I did, and he told others I would have been bullied and slagged,and it would have made High school living hell for me. I cant explain how this guy made me feel, but at the time, he was the only person to make me feel this way, It was special, and he will probably always remain in my heart. Well last year this guy moved away from me,I cant contact him and noone knows where he is. when he first left I felt to sad and depressed, Like someone took a piece of me away. It took me almost a year to get over it but Im still confused about my uality.I figured that I just had to move on with life, because the chances of me seeing him again are slim. i never wanted to be gay, and i just dont understand why I am. I feel so strongly that one day I want kids of my own and a nice wife to share my wife with, but I am just not ually attracted to women, Like I have tried once, and nothing ually happens to me, sorry to sound like a pig but they just dont make me horny. I love women, and there personality and there beautiful looks. I like guys ually, but only 2 emotionally. I really now like this guy in school, I have known him for 4 years or so, But i have had an emotional thing for him for the past 3 months or so. I mean just remembering different memories of him, he is just someone I totally want to be with for my life, He is so kind and nice and helpful and affectionate and so cute. He gives me that special feeling inside, something that just knowing that he is there makes me so happy.I remember when I came down for dinner on a school trip, he I had to sit alone because there was no space anywhere else,and he moved over to make room for me. He does little things ( I dont even think he thinks about doing them , he just does them) that makes me feel special, its just nice, and I want to be with someone like that. But the problem is that people here arent so acceptive of gay people, theres so much phobia etc. I am afraid that if I tell him, he will be horrified, tell everyone else and he would hate me and that I would get bullied , I really dont want that to happen to me. I really like and I feel I should tell him, I dont want anything to happen and for him to move away from him, because the last time that happened I was devastated. I just wish I knew if he was gay or bi, because then we would have the same problem and we could tell each other. Its so hard not being able to talk to people about this and how you feel, I dont have anyone , because my parents are completely anti gay, and I feel that they wouldnt want to be near me if I told them and I dont have many friends either. Noone wants to talk with me. I mean I try so hard to make friends with people, but they talk with me for a minute and then try and get away and go back to their own group. I just want to have friends to hang out with, and to share some time with. I feel like such a loner. I am so shy though, I dont know how to tackle it. I feel that having no friends and all these situations are getting me down and giving me a lack of confidence. Being Gay, not being able to tell people who you really are, and lying to them so you dont get bullied is just so hard, I just need advice to be a happier person, and to know what I should do and what options do I have and what I can do. Any advice would be so amazing. wow, this has turned into a short novel :S, ha thanks for reading and any info is helpfull.